How To Engage Teens 4

Be ready to start from ground zero every 8 years or so. Teens grow up. Then they rip your heart out and take it to college with them!

My youth group WAS the media team AND the worship team! They were not just students. They became fellow labors in the God's work.

We slayed sacred cows together. We discussed hard topics and grew up together. I saw boys grow into men, and girls into Godly women.

THEN THEY ALL LEFT ME!!

This is enough to make you walk away from youth ministry. I "felt called" to transition to college & young marrieds. In reality I was just deeply wounded from the loss of my students.

They are doing great though and I see them on holidays, and some come home for summer.

I have 3 weddings on my calendar!

Nobody prepared me for this though. You need to be ready. It's ok to grieve the loss. It's healthy. You may resist the new batch of 6th graders coming your way. Give them a chance, and fall in love all over again. I know I have.

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You have to bring your A game. We are competing for the attention of the most over advertised media savvy always on generation ever.

If they aren't interested in what you are saying its because you are not interesting. That hurts.

If you say "this generation just doesn't care" then there is nothing you can do. You might as well stop trying to communicate to them.

I prefer to accept that if they didn't hear and respond to what I was trying to communicate I didn't work hard enough to communicate in a compelling way.

I believe every time we speak it should be an expression of art. Painfully work on your art. Hone your craft. They are used to watching 30 sec adds that took tons of cash and man hours to create. They will not listen to us drone on uninspired for 45 min or even 15 min. It's not about a big show or entertainment. It's about caring enough to know where they are hurting and go hurt with them there and share how the life changing message of Jesus changes everything. Share that with passion, personal venerability, and art.

Checkout how Propaganda shares this message in the video below. You might not like the style, you might not like his conclusions, but you are engaged to listen because of the compelling nature of his art.

There is nothing God honoring about throwing a message together 45 min before youth group. If what you're saying matters make it count. Make it art.

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Build a Team It's really simple to keep 5-10 students engaged. You can know them all personally. If you want to grow you have to build a team. Authentic relationships that model and point to christ are the key to life change. For this to scale you need more people building relationships with students.

My first few years of youth ministry I had "helpers" show up but they constantly asked me "What do you want me to do?" That should have been a HUGE warning, but I was too inexperienced to understand how I was failing my team.

A team can only function as well as the leader. I wasn't organized. I didn't plan ahead. I didn't comunicate vision. My helpers soon felt like babysitters. They felt like they were waisting their time because I aparently didn't need them. I had to do EVERYTHING myself because I wasn't organized enough to hand it off to someone else. I felt bad putting my help in the position of doing stuff last minute so I just did it myself. They thought I didn't trust them enough to handle stuff. A lack of organization will kill your team!

You have to think through logistics so that students don't feel like your wasting their time. You have to build authentic relationships with your team so they can invest in your students. This means a lot of administrative work. If you don't track when a student visits, and get their information then how can you or your team followup and build relationships?

Lack of organization is the number one reason my youth ministry didn't grow.

You need both adults and student leaders on your team. Identify their gifting and call that out in them. Connect their abilities to the vision. Invest! Invest! Invest!

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Over the next few days I'll be sharing what I've learned about youth ministry. My views have changed over the years. I'm sure they may change again. I hope this helps someone get unstuck so they can show teens how to live for Jesus.

Authentic Relationships This is square one. Treat students as adults let them know you love and respect them. You can't fake this. If you want them to let you speak into their life you have to make the effort to show up in theirs outside of traditional church time. This includes being real about your struggles in an age appropriate way. We have a whole policy book that governs these kinds of interactions. Be on social media. Txt like souls depend on it. They do.

When was the last time you cried with a parent? It should be often. Parents should know you have their back. You are their assistant coach. If you are working against mom and dad then you are shooting yourself in the foot. You must establish authentic relationships with mom and dad.

Bonhoeffer

I'm reading Bonhoeffer. The biography of Detrich Bonhoeffer. It struck me that the Natzi party gained thier power by promising a state that would uphold moral values of the church.

To be clear Hitler was not a Christian. However German christians had so lost touch with the message of Christ that when someone preached another gospel many hardly noticed.

This should be a warning to Christians who too closly tie national ideas and politics to the mission of the church.

We must be diligent to preach Jesus. His kingdom is other worldly.